Spiritual Cleansing: Forgiveness, Sorrow and Repentance

Looking in the Mirror

  Godly grief produces a repentance 

that leads to salvation without regret.

2 Corinthians 7:10

Forgiving others may lead to an awareness of missteps on our own part. 

FORGIVENESS comes when a right attitude is present. Saying the words. I forgive you, may mean little or a lot. It all depends. Are they heart-felt or unfelt, meant as truth or to appease, true words or false?

Forgiving has everything to do with
-the heart’s motivation,
     -the mind’s attitude,
           -the soul’s condition.

Unfair, unkind, or unloving treatment is quite difficult to release, let alone, to forgive! Harbored bitterness and resentments are a catalyst. They create unhealthy bonds to the person or said event where one was wronged, which resulted in an inability to live free. What to do?

True forgiveness takes a willingness to surrender the offense combined with an act of God’s mercy. In addition, we must ask God to reveal the truth about our own-self, where there is unforgiveness, ungratefulness, and bitterness in us.

Not only does one forgive the offender for their offense, but one should also acknowledge their own offenses.. They look to the past as they acknowledge any acts of unkindness or where they intentionally or unintentionally withheld acceptance, approval, and support. God uses his mirror of truth to reflect his image and to reveal any duplicit behavior in us. He desires us to be pure vessels for His service.

Sorrow for pain we have caused is another step toward true healing. It happened to me. God purified me through a process.

I was in a world of pain after my my mate left and our marriage disintegrated. It was easy to cast blame, but I was blind to my own actions. God began to reveal my part through the Spirit's bringing it to my awareness. It was as if God brought to the forefront the ways I had caused pain to my ex-mate, albeit unknowingly.

This caused a deep sorrow within me. I remembered those times I did not speak words of appreciation for gifts or deeds, which caused my tears to flow in unstoppable streams. I knew that I must speak words of apology and seek forgiveness.

A rich cleansing took place as godly sorrow which leads to repentance purified my inner person. It changed me. An amazing peace entered. I was free.

Dear Father God, you are so good to us. You redeem the past to set us free.

Don't Fret or be Afraid, God is Always with You

A Hope and a Promise after Divorce

He will be with you, he will not leave you or forsake you.... Deuteronomy 31:8

Divorce devastates. Rejection injures. God helps. God heals. He is our security.

REJECTION has the power to spew injurious messages in the wounded person. When a marriage is ripped apart, negative emotions ravage the mind’s sensitivities. It can leave a person gasping, struggling to make sense of what happened. Divorce smashes the dream that once shone so brightly and leaves destruction in its wake.

There are many ways to absorb these internal hurts. Some bury their feelings. Others unleash volleys of red-hot attacks. Some become overwhelmed by loss and grief. A few walk away in denial, never looking back.

Unwelcome intruders jump on the emotional bandwagon. Resentment and bitterness visit in the quiet hours. Anger and spite seek payback with a vindictiveness that sabotages efforts at joy and happiness.

Sorrow and sadness become a cloak of gloom that is difficult to lift. Depression and discouragement may rob children of the home they once had that is now just a wistful dream. It is hard. The devastation of divorce will have repercussions and outfall. What to do?

If this is you, you are stronger than you think. All is not hopeless even when it may seem so. For you see, it is not the end of the story. Life goes on. The person must go on with it. Once the shock wears off and pain is managed, then it becomes possible to learn, change, and grow. It takes time, patience, and hard work to recover from injured self-perceptions and personal loss before one is able to live again.

We are not alone. God strengthens us when we feel weak. He holds us when we are weary. He guides us when we are confused, struggling with our present and fearful of our future. Our heavenly Father promises to never leave us, though the aloneness seems almost unbearable. He is true and steady. Gentle is his healing balm and loving grace. God is here.

Dear Father God, you are my comfort and peace, an ever present help in times of trouble. I’m so glad.

HEALING OF PAINS FROM THE PAST

No matter how long ago it happened, you have to yield yourself to God's way in order to heal a trauma. A year after my husband left me and the family, I decided to ask God for healing. This was my own idea. No one encouraged me to go there. I was broken inside but alive in God. I was open to healing if that was something I needed. I didn't know what to expect but I trusted God to do what only he could do.

Teacher picture in those days.

God took me at my word. A few days later memories began to surface, usually after an intense time in the word and in prayer. I only prayed the prayer once, but I guess that's all God was waiting for me to do. I was seeking intimacy in my relationship with God. I had been pursuing God with no holds barred. My life was changing as a result of my new found openness with God. God helped me heal and returned peace to my soul.

Here is a segment written in my first journal from during that time of upheaval and renewal.

JOURNAL 1 -- 2003 

Most days I walk in the orchard for exercise and as a time of renewal. This morning, while in the orchard I talked with God about the spiritual desire I have to walk through the pains of the past, to give them to Him, to let go of them, to have them change from a wound to a scar. 

I cannot do this on my own. I don’t even know how to allow Him to lift and free me from their power, to release them.  I asked for His help in doing this. 

To begin this process of walking through the pains of the past and remembering their hurt and then offering them to God; I went back to the beginning. I began to remember those first few weeks of marriage when I realized that my husband and I were not going to have the close marriage fellowship I had envisioned, how I had felt the lack of bonding together--and the aloneness I felt.  

I remembered how at the time I realized that my marriage was probably a big mistake, and how I regretted my choice.  I also remembered my determination to put my marriage in God’s hands.  For 21 years that was the way it had been.

I allowed myself to feel, to remember that terrible day, when my first born was a baby, when my husband told me he was leaving because it just wasn’t working out, how he didn’t love me or have feelings for me, how he had not really wanted to marry me, the doubts he had before we wed.   

The pain of these memories was so intense that I wept so hard my heart just hurt.  I asked God to release me from their pain.  I felt exhausted, depleted of all energy.  After the tears subsided the beauty of the trees and creation spoke to me.  As I stood there the memory of the biblical character Job--and his intense suffering and faithfulness--touched me.   

I want to listen for His communion when I finish this."

By giving my hurts to God, I was able to access his healing grace. The sorrow and suffering left my inner being and never returned. A redemptive touch of God met my need and healed me. My wounds became a trophy of God's tender touch making me anew.

Life is tremendously different ever since that day. God set me free and began to shape me. I am grateful. 

My full story can be found here in two audio segments of pain and healing. May God minister to your heart through them. 

Please share my testimony with someone God puts on your heart.

Blessings, my friend. 

I welcome any comments.