Monday, January 13, 2014

Escape from Lies, Begin the Journey

Every single day we find ourselves making choices that define our journey's destiny.
Take that first step.
We can be pretty hard on ourselves. True. We can. Sometimes we down-right lie to ourselves. It happened to me. I believed a lie that defined me from childhood up. It was not a lie that anyone spoke to me, it was just something I believed about myself, kinda like a nail in the coffin....not bringing any life to me. It was a deadening projection which colored my thinking. I never expected to succeed in college because of this internalized message which I had believed because I compared myself  to others. I did not believe I was "good enough" but mostly I did not believe I was "smart enough." I remember being asked, if there was one thing you could change about yourself, what would you change? My mind replied, I would want to be smarter.

Years later I realized that it wasn't true. It was a lie I had believed. I am smart enough. There are many types of intelligences. In education we call these, multiple intelligences. What an eye-opener when I realized the truth. My gifting is not in academic acquisition or test-taking excellence, not something that shows in any remarkable way on IQ measurements, but my brand of "smarts" have intrinsic value nevertheless. I have something unique to say that is all my own. My feelings and beliefs about myself in those days (and even now once in awhile) made me feel the invariable "less than" other people, especially in comparison to the achievers I always wished I could be, like those who could ace a test without even studying while I studied all night to pull a "B." I felt I didn't measure up. One gets in the habit of noticing others' successes and minimizing your own successes.

Lies enter easily and leave slowly. We must be able to ferret them out, to recognize them for what they are. I read a book a few years back about lies women believe about themselves. Many lies we believe come as the result of another person's negative comments. The perceived message becomes internalized. Eating disorders like anorexia or bulimia often have a hurtful "dig" that changed the person's self-perception into one of self-hate, the humiliation of it all, the assumption that they are unworthy or unequal unless they can change that "thing" that makes them unattractive. As a teacher, I have seen it many times, a child who is crushed by unkind statements or "mean girl" peer manipulation. For some children, school becomes a dreaded place, the bullying and insults are a daily occurrence. Some of us have experienced this. There are times as a teacher, I have addressed this issue with students, to call a spade a spade. It is important to become skilled at deterring negative exchanges that affect the social climate in classrooms, schools, churches, relationships and homes.

I can think of many lies that have tripped people up or perceptions that have contributed to low self-worth or personal stagnation. "If only ...."   "I wish........  "I can't ...." I'm not...." "Nothing ever turns out right for me."  "No one could ever want/like/love/care-for me."   Other contributors caused by ways people have treated us communicate the following three biggies: unmet needs, unhealed hurts, and unresolved issues. They damage our psyche and emotions. Even neglect. In my marriage I was rarely complimented. Years later, when I reentered the dating field, I found myself weeping the first time I was told the words, "You're beautiful." The neglect had communicated a lie. I no longer felt desirable. Emotional wounding can ravage the mind with hurtful messages that thought-by-thought destroy our sensitivities and lie to us. Internalized messages can be deeply held and believed, especially when positive messages are woefully inadequate or absent. It may take a life time of God's intervening to turn the ship around, to make us well and emotionally healthy. Spiritual health is tied to emotional health. The two cannot be separated. We owe it to ourselves to pick up the pieces of our lives and seek a way to our healing.

God is in the business of helping broken people. He wants to free us from the lies we have believed. Drawing close to God and seeking his healing deliverance is a first step in your life's journey of many hundreds and thousands of such steps. God uses Scripture, trusted friends, spiritual books, godly ministers, times of meditation, wise counselors, and other means to accomplish this. What do we have to do? We need to show up! We must want our own healing. We must confront the lies believed. 

A little secret I have found which really delivers the goods is this:  Put a new thought--a word of truth--in place of the lie you have believed. When negative thoughts have played for years they create well-worn paths, like a ruts in a dirt road. It helps to get off that track to form a new track. This will develop a positive pattern of right thinking, which, hopefully, guides our thinking in the way God would want us to think.

"I'm not smart enough" is replaced with "I am smart enough." 
  "I am the person God made me to be, and God doesn't make junk!" 
    "I am special. It doesn't matter what people think. It matters what God thinks."
      "I can do this because God will help me do it. We're in this together!" 
        "It's not the end of the world if it doesn't turn out right!"
             "It's okay, God must not have been in it. I'll do something else that God wants me to do."

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.*
 Transform your mind.
   Send the lies packing.
     Bring the truth statements home. 
       Ask Father God to help you do this one step at a time.
         Exchange lies for a truth.   
            When it happens, and it will happen....
                To God be the Glory!

Begin today. You won't be sorry you did.


Written in connection with "When A Women Finds Her Voice," by JoAnn Fore.
Amazon Book Link is HERE

#When a Woman Finds Her Voice
N. L. Brumbaugh ... All rights Reserved


  1. I love this message, great job getting it across.

  2. Thank you. It is a message that is always applicable. I must remind myself of it at times when negative thoughts crowd in. Blessings ...